The Podcast

SOME CANADIAN GUYS TALKING ABOUT SOCCER

Sure, there are other podcasts out there, but we (as always) are trying to do something a little different… a little bit of snark, a little bit of insight (?), a little bit of nonsense and, hopefully, a big helping of entertainment. Give it a listen and let us know what you think by leaving a comment below or sending us an email: canadiansoccerguys@gmail.com

Episode #20: December 29, 2009

This is our year-end extravaganza! Ah, who are we kidding, we’re all half-drunk and we do our best to recap the year and look ahead to 2010, but the result is a bunch of yelling and libel. Ostensibly, topics include what went right in Canadian soccer in 2009, the voting for men’s player of the year, projections for 2010 (including the World Cup) and general meandering commentary about our holiday seasons. Plus a Stupid Soccer Story about Jamie and Squizz making friends in Columbus, Ohio.

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #19: November 9, 2009

It’s November, and we have Canadian soccer stories to talk about? We sure do! Stephen Hart’s interim tag being removed (apparently), the rosters for the upcoming friendlies against Macedonia and Poland, and a breakdown of who’s worse: Asmir Begovic or Jacob Lensky. Plus, Grant and Jamie do their customary grandstanding about Chelsea and Arsenal, and we debate who’s in a better position to win the Premiership: the guy seen brushing his teeth in the stands at Stamford Bridge, or Liverpool FC. Plus, a very special Stupid Soccer Story from Bill Clinton!

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #18: November 2, 2009

Eighteen, huh? Our little podcast is all grown up, ready to leave the house and go out into the world. Thankfully we’ve experienced no such maturation process, employing this “soccer” podcast to chat about garbage like Halloween, Swiss Chalet and Dr. Dre (in addition to real topics like Stephen Hart’s “mystery callup”, the MLS awards and the Premiership title race).

We do, however, land our first real interview here, with former Canadian U20 and Toronto FC goalkeeper David Monsalve, who talks about winning the Finnish Cup with his new club FC Inter Turku, as well as the passion of Canadian supporters, life in Finland, some of his former teammates and the future of the men’s national team (and his place in it).

I highly suggest you listen. But then, I always say that. Still, you should.

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #17: October 27, 2009

We flog a dead horse in gratuitous fashion, picking over the festering, stinky corpse of Toronto FC’s 2009 season in the wake of the Massacre at the Meadowlands. Once that’s finally over with, we mock part of our audience in a new feature called Voyageurs Theatre (they started it!), bring back an old, lazy feature known as Promotion/Relegation, and discuss important topics such as Crystal Gravy, Maradona-flavoured beer and the best damned soccer show period — Los Profesionales!

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #16: October 12, 2009

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, we give everyone something to be thankful for — another episode of the podcast. Jamie, however, is off enjoying “real” Thanksgiving, so in his place we welcome our second-ever in-studio guest, Ben Knight of Onward Soccer. This episode features much ruminating about Toronto FC’s late-game failings, some chatter about the first leg of the Montreal/Vancouver USL1 championship, and some (hopefully) final thoughts on Asmir Begovic. Plus, Ben regales us all with a patented Stupid Soccer Story… all this, plus you get to hear Ben, Grant and Squizz talk about how to succeed with the ladies. You can’t miss that!

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #15: September 13, 2009

After another extended hiatus, we manage to churn out a show that — despite us having a month to prepare for it — is really “some Canadian guys talking about soccer” in name only. “Some Canadian guys floundering helplessly for 45 minutes” would probably have been more accurate, but not quite as catchy. We allegedly talk about the big news in TFC land — Dichio’s retiring, JDG’s arrival, so on and so forth — but really, it’s just three juvenile buffoons talking nonsense.

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #14: August 10, 2009

Technical difficulties nearly destroy us yet again (which, all things considered, may have been for the best), but we do churn out another show, focusing on the wonderful privilege we all had of seeing Real Madrid at BMO Field, Toronto FC’s implosion in the Champions League, and featuring our all-encompassing (?) Premier League Preview. Plus we’ve got a nice dance remix of Grant expressing his opinions on Cristiano Ronaldo.

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Episode #13: August 3, 2009

After a few episodes in which we seemed to be hitting our stride when it comes to balancing useful soccer talk with abject nonsense, the silly meter was cranked right back up this week. e do try and get to the heart of matters such as Asmir Begovic’s state of mind, the constant “will they or won’t they?” of Montreal-to-MLS expansion talks and whether TFC vs. Real Madrid really is the “biggest game of the summer” (hint: it’s not). And we also introduce the new Promotion/Relegation Roundup (brought to you by the good folks at The ProRel Group) which lets us hit on the pertinent soccer issues of the day, such as the price of Cristiano Ronaldo’s legs, the efficacy of bourbon in curing the swine flu, and the upcoming Homeless World Cup.

Plus, we talk about our visit to the zoo.

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #12: July 27, 2009

We make enemies! It’s a race to see who sues us first after this episode… will it be the Red Patch Boys? Geri Halliwell? Phil Collins? Or — the most likely candidate — CONACACAF henchman Chuck Blazer? Tune in and come to your own conclusions! And while you’re listening, you may also accidentally encounter some discussion about the Gold Cup final, the Toronto FC supporter group boycott in Columbus and all sorts of other footie knick-knacks.

Show notes for Episode #12:
Travels With Chuck Blazer…
du Nord

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #11: July 13, 2009

Could this be our most insightful episode yet? Perhaps, but the competition isn’t exactly very stiff. Jamie and Squizz muse about their road trip to Columbus to watch Canada defeat El Salvador in the Gold Cup, before we all move on to subjects ranging from Asmir Begovic’s future, to the use of instant replay in soccer, to the proper pronunciation of Ali Gerba’s name. But there’s plenty of nonsense too, just in case you got worried that you were listening to the wrong show.

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #10: July 5, 2009

We celebrate our “velvet anniversary” with an unprecedented, uninterrupted stream-of-consciousness babblefest about the Gold Cup, featuring Canada’s opening 1-0 victory over Jamaica and the team’s chances in the remainder of the tournament. The following names are use during this podcast: Julian de Guzman, Stephen Hart, Dwayne DeRosario, Asmir Begovic. How, and in what context? You need to listen to find out!

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #9: June 15, 2009

Are these little show descriptions still necessary? Read the rest of them and you’ll get an idea of what’s on this show: nonsensical personal anecdotes, juvenile giggling, copyright infringement, dubious show planning and the occasional mention of something about soccer. If that sounds up your alley, give it a listen!

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #8: June 7, 2009

Following one of the darkest weeks in Toronto FC’s short history (though not a half bad one for the Vancouver Whitecaps), we somehow drift into an unprovoked and absurd discussion of Jim Brennan’s status as captain… not only that, we yammer about the CONCACAF World Cup qualifiers (surely offending someone in the process) and, in a particularly painful bit of coincidental timing, we also hit on FIFA’s recent law change that could mean the future for the Canadian men’s national team is more dire than originally thought… or does it? Who knows? Better listen to find out!

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #8:
U.S. Soccer Keeps Searching for a True Home GameNew York Times article about the U.S./Honduras game
How Real Madrid can afford to buy Kaka — A London Times article written by someone who, unlike the three of us, can presumably say Kaka without giggling

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Episode #7: May 31, 2009

After an extended (and merciful) hiatus, all three of us are back together to kill some of our time and yours. We hit on the first win for the men’s national team in a year, and the women’s team finding their feet under a new head coach… plus, babbling about Real Madrid’s potential visit to BMO Field, a heated exchange about whether regular-season matches “matter”, a final (and intermittently bitter) look back at the season in Europe, Promotion/Relegation, and a Stupid Soccer Story! Good God, why are you still reading this description, you need to start listening right now!

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #7:
If The Music’s Loud Enough… — last one you’re gettin’ from us, Gorms! Maybe…

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Episode #6.5: May 3, 2009

Grant and Squizz go at it alone, and the extent to which Jamie props up the show becomes painfully evident. Topics include TFC’s approach to the Voyageurs Cup and whether managers have an obligation to play entertaining footie (based on Chelsea’s performance against Barcelona, which suggested they don’t). Also, Stupid Soccer Stories brings us the tale of two angry South Korean bricklayers, and we stagger through the abomination that is Red/Yellow/Warning one more time.

This episode doesn’t even deserve its own show notes; just visit If The Music’s Loud Enough already, would ya?

Click here to listen/download

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Episode #6: April 26, 2009

Our best show ever (though the competition is hardly stiff)! In the aftermath of John Carver’s resignation, we talk to our buddy Magpie Chris about soccer aliens, and we muse about Carver’s possible replacements, including the hobo who sells newspapers outside our local drugstore. We analyze (really!) the last few Toronto FC games… after detailing the horror of Grant in an anatomically-correct Batsuit. Jamie also regales us with a Stupid Soccer Story about his experience in an Austrian beer league, and we take a look at all sorts of stuff in Promotion/Relegation — including Squizz showing off his research skills shortly before cocking up a basic piece of information. If you only listen to one episode of this podcast… well, you’re a jerk. Listen to all of them.

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #6
If The Music’s Loud Enough…
National Post story about the flare-throwing incident at BMO Field
Grant’s post: “More goals the better?”
Article about Aaron Schneebeli
Randy Levine v.s. Don Garber!
Frank Lampard v.s. English radio!
“Big” Zack Thornton’s save v.s. FC Dallas

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Episode #5: April 19, 2009

We welcome our first-ever guest, Ben Rycroft, into the studio. To prepare for this momentous occasion, we drank large amounts of beer, sang karaoke at a local establishment, and completely forgot to plan the show (yes, believe it or not, we usually do a little bit of preparation). We do have Ben telling us a Stupid Soccer Story about his own surprising hooligan streak. But beyond that, any resemblance this podcast bears to a discussion of soccer (or even normal human conversation) is strictly coincidental.

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #5:
If The Music’s Loud Enough…
It’s Called Football – The TFC Blog (Rycroft’s baby)
The IFC post-game show for TFC/Dallas (featuring Squizz inexplicably filling in for Rycroft)

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Episode #4: April 12, 2009

After taking about five minutes to actually mention soccer, we poke at such topics as hipster soccer hooligans, Clint Dempsey’s haircut, wireless bagels and the potential for Grant and Jamie to end up in the hospital after the upcoming Champions League matches. Plus we bring back Excited Soccer Commentators Narrating Everyday Events and Promotion/Relegation. Huzzah!

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #4:
If The Music’s Loud Enough…
The Julian de Guzman “no sex for a year” story
The Guardian’s writeup on Simeon Jackson
North Korea accuses South Korea of poisoning

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Episode #3: April 6, 2009

We offer you a pointless TFC-Sounders recap, a roast of the Toronto Star’s Cathal Kelly and learn about the death threat Squizz once received at an Under-7 match gone wrong. Grant and Jamie exchange no useful information as they argue about Chelsea and Arsenal, and we introduce a brand new feature called Red/Yellow/Whistle (or is it Warning?)

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #3:
If The Music’s Loud Enough…
Cathal Kelly’s incendiary piece in the Toronto Star
The Jim Brennan story from The Footie Fool
The 24th Minute

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Episode #2: March 29, 2009

We talk about the long-overdue firing of Dale Mitchell, the aftermath of Toronto FC’s visit to Columbus and the most recent World Cup qualifying games in the CONCACAF zone. Plus we explain the term “Frankie Nicaraguan beach punch” in the new Stupid Soccer Stories segment, and do a roundup of all sorts of soccer-related items in another new segment, Promotion/Relegation.

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #2:
It’s Called Football, March 28 – our appearance on It’s Called Football, archived on Ben Rycroft’s blog (also named It’s Called Football)
Onward Soccer – Ben Knight’s (relatively) new site
24th Minute – what story will Duane Rollins break next?
If The Music’s Loud Enough… – our buddy Gormsey’s music blog; give it a look
Men’s National Team Player Profiles – as Jamie promised
North Korean soccer – Wiki entry on the DPR Korea Football Association
CanadaSoccer.com profiles – the CSA’s ridiculous player profile list
USL broadcasting – press release about the United Soccer League streaming its games this season
Timbers Army – one of many YouTube clips highlighting the exploits of the Timbers Army, the supporters group of the USL’s Portland Timbers
The Brass Rail – for all your stripper-related needs

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Episode #1: March 22, 2009

Our inaugural episode has dreaming up names for Vancouver’s MLS team (and musing about some of the team-naming missteps in North American soccer), looking at the heroes (and villains) of Toronto FC’s very young campaign and, of course, Grant and Jamie get some time to snipe at each other about the seasons that Chelsea and Arsenal are having. Plus we introduce a segment called Excited Soccer Commentators Narrating Everyday Events — yes, it’s as dumb as it sounds.

Click here to listen/download

Show notes for Episode #1
If The Music’s Loud Enough…

5 Responses to “The Podcast”

  1. […] it a listen, let us know what you think, and check out the show notes for some web links relevant to the content of this […]

  2. […] fan and/or a bored employee of Metro News, why not kill your Sunday night strolling through our podcast archives? If you play them back-to-back, you can eat up almost five hours of your life! Wow! You’re […]

  3. […] sometimes comes quickly in the beautiful game On our podcast, we occasionally do a feature called Stupid Soccer Stories, where one of us (or a guest) relays […]

  4. […] Whistle” and, maybe, possibly, if you’re good… you might get a new episode of our show, Some Canadian Guys Talking About Soccer, before the new year. Stay […]

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