The Reserve Squad: CONCACAF to launch immediate referee review

In the aftermath of questionable calls made during a pair of CONCACAF Champions League matches last night — Toronto FC v. Arabe Unido and the Columbus Crew v. Santos Laguna — the continental governing body has pledged to launch an immediate review of its refereeing program.

“This is the first time that issues such as phantom foul-calling, unpunished time wasting, unjustified card-showing and general incompetence have been brought to our attention,” the organization said in a release. “Having only recently been advised of these problems — thanks to the helpful suggestions of our fans in the United States and Canada — we will access the offshore holdings account labeled ‘Referee Rainy Day Fund’.”

According to CONCACAF, the fund will be used to bring all referees — even those officiating games played in Colon, Panama before a crowd of 300 people — up to the standard of the region’s finest, such as Benito Archundia, Joel Aguilar and Jair Marrufo.

“Not the Referee Rainy Day Fund!” said CONCACAF general secretary Chuck Blazer, when reached for comment. “I was gonna use that money to go play racquetball with the Dalai Lama!”

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4 Responses to “The Reserve Squad: CONCACAF to launch immediate referee review”

  1. Ah haahaahaah! CONCACAF actually performing the oversight duties of an effective sports federation! Ahahahaa hahaaa! A hilarious idea! The ref’s are terrible, and someone at CONCACAF cares! Haaha!

    Ugh, kill me now.

  2. We should join the OFC.

  3. Kevin Smith Says:

    We could claim that our part of the Arctic Circle is in Asia, and therefore we should qualify to play in the Asian federation?

  4. Soccergimpl Says:

    Easy, we do it like Israel (in UEFA though not remotely Europe!) … make it so noone in our region can stomach playing us, make it perilous for our boys just to go to our neighbors to play … the ask to be admitted in OFC, then we beat up on everybody, except some quality matches with NZ and world cup 2018 here we come!

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